Happy birthday, Scara

Since Sara has that scratch under her eye from the night before, I am calling her Scara. You know, like Scar from The Lion King?

Except for the fact that she keeps mentioning the scratches and the fact that it all happened on her birthday, she is in fairly good spirits. I try to make her feel better by taking her to MBK, where we have some food and I buy us a VIP ticket to The Amazing Spiderman 2 (which is pretty crappy, despite having Andrew Garfield and Emma Stone in it)

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Free welcome drink in the VIP lounge

I thought I was a mall person. That was until today. If I wasn’t here with Sara, I would sit down on the floor and sob until someone carries me out of this textile hell. We actually manage to get lost more than once in this friggin country of a mall, and at one point I have to ask the Information desk how I get out of there. Some things can actually be too big.

We get back to our hostel, Born Free, and spontaniously book a flight to Chiang Mai. Then we head to We ❤️ Bangkok hostel to get a few beers with Kirstin. We end up at the Patpong night market, and we see a ping pong show with ping pong balls – finally! The girl hits me in the face with one, so ratchet. Another one writes this message with a sharpie shoved up her special place:

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There is no entrance fee at the ping pong show, but buying at least one drink per person is required – and they are all 200 baht. I go to pay for my drink at the bar, but I am met by an old, big and moody thai woman, who wants me to pay over 5000 baht for three drinks, a show and an extra show. I refuse, telling her I am only paying for the drink I agreed to pay for, and I hand her two 100 baht bills. She doesn’t accept them, now shouting at me to pay for Kirstin and Sara as well, a total of 600 baht. I put my money back in my purse and try to walk away, when she jumps in front of me and gets aggressive. The girls approach me to see what’s going on, and a small discussion starts. The girls each hand over 200 baht, and I do as well with a big sigh. This pushes the lady over the edge, and she starts to scream and shove me, and we hurry out. We walk back to Kirstin’s hostel, before we say goodbye and take a taxi back to Born Free.

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It’s sad to say goodbye. Two weeks ago, I went up to this girl painting the palms of her hands with flourescent paint and said, “this is a strange request, but can you do a handprint on my butt?”
It was love at first indecent proposal.
Two weeks and two pubcrawls, one hilarious bikini wax in Koh Tao, and countless balloons and toasties later, it’s goodbye… for now. Ratches ass hoes drunk in love 4evah <3